#Idk how it got to london
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There has been zero fangirls talk I know nothing pls share
it’s a new musical from Australia that is currently playing in London which is about girl who is a fan of a boyband… whose lead singer is called Harry… they are British and all auditioned for a tv talent show and were put together as a boyband…
anyway so she is 14 and writes self insert fanfiction. She co-writes a fic with a male fan from America called @ saltypringl (the best character in the show) about Harry and the fan going on the run so he can escape his evil management who are working him to death (fan girl says she can see depression in his eyes) (also Salty throws in a mention that management are concealing “multiple queer relationships in the band”)
fan girl kidnaps Harry irl and tries to convince him to go on the run with her but he’s like wtf is wrong with you, you’re disgusting
so she and her friends decide to drug him and throw him in the woods to be found and she will magically not go to jail
he then goes back on tour but halfway through his show realises she was right and leaves the band.
there’s a lot more to the story than this and it is quite mostly played slapstick (as I’m sure you’d hope, reading that synopsis) but it lowkey offended me. The writer was inspired by the reaction when Zayn left 1D and wanted to write something that portrays how strong and valid teenage girls and their feelings are
but imho she fell short of that and the belittling and patronising she did to fandom and fic writers through it undid all the good she might’ve done.
It was written from yes, a sympathetic, but ultimately an outside perspective and offended me as a lifelong fic writer and boyband fan.
I will defend fan fiction strongly and anything that reinforces the idea that all fic is teenagers writing self insert is damaging to our community
#If anyone doesn’t know musical theatre is my industry#Doesn’t make me an expertt#But I also don’t think it was a very good musical#As in if I didn’t speak the language and couldn’t get offended it would still have not been a good musical#It wasn’t very coherent#Both the songs and also the storyline#And the tone#Sometimes it was dark then slapstick but not in ways that compliment itself#Idk how it got to london#Anyway it seems to have a cult following like Six#So hopefully the stans don’t come for me lmao#But I’d love to know their background. Cos…….
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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Rolling With Difficulty as texts I have saved on my computer for some reason
(i drew every day for like a month straight and burnt out so have this nonsense instead)
#rolling with difficulty#dani rwd#finbar rwd#kyana rwd#vrla rwd#vr la rwd#which of those is the correct tag. like genuine question#k lb rwd#maxim rwd#i had one that was k-lb and c-ra but it got eaten by tumblr somehow#anyway sorry for the wildly varying formatting these are amassed across like 4 years and god knows how many messaging apps#if you want context to 'we eat spoon' me and my friend bought a bean curd and for some reason we thought the spoon was made of like#that biodegradable/technically edible plastic material#i mean idk what it was actually made of but it sure as shit wasnt edible because i was the one who tried#same friend is the one who almost died on a highway with me because we misread google maps and tried to push our bikes#along a highway shoulder for 30 minutes at like... 12 in the morning#selling your soul for 25 bucks is a joke from when i was playing fallen london and actually sold my soul in game for about that much#im realising now that i may very well be the dani of my friend group and i have no idea how to feel about that#the original of the crush on maxim one was me @ my arospec ace friend who loved making fun of me for my dumb crushes#so it was like. my one rare chance to take revenge because while they were Suffering with that *i* was studying for a competition! lmao#i should do these more often like i do these for all my fandoms and its always a blast every time
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#just finished packing my suitcase for my flight tomorrow :(((#i dont :((( wanna go :((((((((((#idk its very mixed emotions bc on one hand i do miss my mom and my bed and my stuff#but i also have had the absolute time of my life this past month in london and im going to miss it so much#but i also know im going to enjoy myself in brazil too and im excited to spend time there and meet family ive never actually seen before#but that doesnt negate how much ill miss london and how incredible this city it. bc like it really is incredible. and i got to do SO much#while ive been here. even those smaller minitrips to dublin and edinburgh and staying in hostels for the first time#like that was so much fucking fun and i know i wont be able to do things like that in brazil#idk im exhausted and sad but also really happy and i am very much aware how lucky i am to be able to do this#and how special it is that i have family willing to help me and friends who were willing to host me and show me around#im just!!!! in my feelings!!!! and im having many feelings!!!!!!#but by this time tomorrow i should be on my plane heading home. then 2 days of rest before im back on another flight. i need. to SLEEP.#i hope you all are well!!!! kisses to all of you!!!!!!!!! please keep your fingers crossed that i dont miss my layover!!!!!!!!!#personal
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another fallen london essay ramble whoo boy (i dont plan these btw) (spoilers for firmament and light fingers in particular plus general spoilers)
ok so do yall remember that one line in Firmament Chapter three where Summer drinks moon milk and looks directly at the player character and nothing happens? if not i get it, that section was pretty hard to follow and it was ultimately inconsequential and also optional so here it is
(from the fallen london wiki - Suggest Summer do it instead)
anyone whos played Light Fingers or is familiar with that plotline knows that this makes zero sense. even normal moon milk has extreme effect if ingested. and unless we're going to have some kind of toxic romance arc with Summer (which would be great but given the lack of foreshadowing and other aforementioned reasons is highly unlikely) we can chalk this up to sloppy writing and unfamiliarity with that ambition on whoever wrote this. such frustration seems to be the consensus on this chapter, at least on here
But! ive been following some liveblogging of early Light Fingers, reminiscing etc etc, when i remembered one other odd tie in to moon milk, in the cave of the nadir. now analyzing the nadir is similarly difficult to zenith because its very vauge and theres a lot of disconnected elements in there all in service of making a place thats confusing and dangerous and unknowable and whatever so take this with a grain of zalt. im sure theres some juicy deeplore in there but what i want to focus on is this
(from the fallen london wiki - "It was the milk... it was the milk, wasn't it?")
this is a weird callout, right? afaik thats one of the very few connections to an ambition in the nadir, alongside whatever the frost moth does in nemesis (havent gotten there yet). so like what gives? its not an especially rewarding action, and it doesnt progress the ambition or anything. its possible, given this comes after the orphanage section, that these two are like escapees of the orphanage after the fire / riot, but it could also be some disconnected memory its all very difficult to discern. and even if that is the case it doesnt really tell us much except maybe foreshadowing for Hephesta's situation. the best i can say is that, taken in context with the other options on that card, maybe its a parallel to Clarabelle's situation, with the references to eggs? there has to be some reason behind this reference, and if there isnt one, than at least let me headcanon this
i think the two instances above tell us very little on their own, but taken in together have fascinating implications. irrigo and violant are thematically opposed colors, forgetting vs remembering, and zenith / the nadir are explicitly connected both textually and in their names (zenith means the highest point of a space or object, nadir means the lowest), so that they both reference moon milk is interesting to say the least. I think this could be telling us that moon milk has different effects when under these two neathbow colors. Moon milk induced obsession seems to be resistant to the psyche destroying affects of the nadir, persisting for the two people in a place where memory is actively unravelled. the woman, even as she tells her companion to forget her, still clearly recalls the affect of the moon milk and her newfound obsessions. maybe this is somehow due to the milk's affect of overwhelming the victims previous life, in essence forcing them to forget what was previously important to them. or maybe, given irrigo's connection with lack of perception and drawing inward, the idea is that when the victim has nothing else to cling to in the nadir, the love instilled by the moon milk persists as a sort of internal source of comfort. in zenith, the violant light seems to dull or entirely nullify the milk's effects if that moment with Summer is to be believed. its stated that the violant forces the player character to be aware of every detail at once, able to perceive even distant objects with total clarity, splitting your attention everywhere at once. the way moon milk works is just an extreme version of a classic love potion: a victim falls deeply in love specifically with the first thing they see. maybe, because one perceives everything at the same time, the moon milk cannot properly take effect. or maybe the violant is just too oppressive, preventing the milk from occupying a victims thoughts as they are overwhelmed by the light.
whatever the case may be this is a very odd pairing. for a section so filled with moon misers, firmament has very little by way of references to Light Fingers, odd given thats one of the main places one would encounter a moon miser. no comment. and that moment in the nadir has always struck me as peculiar, if only for it being seemingly out of nowhere and disconnected to everything else. but moon misers are linked to apocyanic light with some degree of regularity, so i dont think its too great a stretch to connect them to other neathbow colors as well. one wonders how everyones favorite roof beetles might be affected by the other colors of the neath. even if im totally off base and disproven by some text in the high sancta or sunless skies or whatever there has to be something here im sure of it. or maybe ive lost it who knows certainly not me okay bye
#the main issue with this idea#is that i think theres some text about how the illuminated use the milk to tether themselves to the vulgate/immanent#but i cant remember because it was hard to follow so idk (ironic for a chapter centered around violant hmmm)#im sorry i actually dont hate firmament its just frustrating and an easy target lol#still upset that we had an entire section dedicated to moon misers + 2 moon miser companions and STILL got no official art of them tho >:(#fwiw i dont think these connections were intentional#though itd be great if it was#this was fun maybe i should share more fl headcanons#i have Many Thoughts regarding the neathbow but i dont have all the facts so ill save that for another time :3#and of course feel free to add things or disagree with me or call out something i missed bc im still not 100% sure what to make of this#essay ramble#long post#fallen london#fl spoilers#fallen london firmament#firmament spoilers#feeling very pepe sylvia with this one girlies#waow so many tags sorry
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possibly my most self-indulgent oc yet & guess what. she’s for obey me
#obey me#oc : himura no chiyoko#the no is there for a reason#i love chiyoko… so much… ok what if :#you were essentially the heir of a clan of space pirates (not that that’s all the himura is but u get the picture) and. also somehow d#descended from a demon… and also you were kind of a sports star… and you came from 500 years in the future… and (during sport) you jumped#into the heart of a dying star after your childhood best friend / first love and somehow you end up in 21st century london so you do your#best & you generally do OK except said bff died going thru the star & you didn’t cos of ur demon heritage so you’re just alone here. so you#start various relationships all of which end with you getting your heartbroken because you’ve been in love with the same person since u#were 8 and ur not ready for the 21st century dating scene and then#you get abducted into what is basically hell as a ‘human’ exchange student when half of the time you Are Blue.#so you think OK maybe this is how i get home maybe they can time travel except they’re all DICKS to you and you (you are like 23/24 by the#way) cry in your closet every day because it’s just a Lot and then you FALL IN LOVE WITH SOME OF THEM and they seem to love u back#and for the first time since u left home u feel like maybe u can have a family again. because u left ur fam behind when u jumped into the#dying star remember. but then#this freak in the attic KILLS YOU and none of them do anything about it#so you move in with the hottie next door (mephisto)#but you are 1. hopeless 2. romantic 3. stupid 4. beautiful so you eventually rekindle things … and maybe even w the guy who killed u#idk i’m undecided if she romances belphie yet#we got mephisto lucifer mammon & levi for sure. maybe 4 husbands is enough for her#OH YEAH. AND YOURE STILL GRIEVING YOUR DEAD BFF/GF. UNTIL YOU REALISE YOURE ONLY STILL GRIEVING BECAUSE ITS ALL YOU HAVE OF HOME.#anyway that’s chiyoko 🥰
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anyway! officially booked both the time off and the hotel to go to london for my birthday. this will be nice
#saying it out loud so its real a little here#we're gonna roll it into seeing family too#nyxtalks#idk if anyone actually resds these but. good solution to my messy emotions about not having people to do things with anymore#just get the fuck outta here#its middle of summer holidays so im gonna try & find. some less popular things to do! maybe even. not do them with my mum#but also doing them alone will be. overwhelming. but maybe good for me#anyway. couple weeks to go. we will see how it goes#i wish i was the kind of person to go out to bars. londons got a lot of queer spots maybe itd be nice to go. be me#i so very rarely get to be me#(i just wouldnt enjoy the bar alone part though. but ONCE AGAIN. this is the birthday plan Because im alone)#i guess im still having those feelings i was having. but at least im not gonna be sat at home miserable now#i wanna maybe do smthn fun on here too. yall are my actual connections these days. idk!#its the 18th. got a little to decide. idk what would even be fun for people
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wanting to do art around a song but not knowing how to go about it is currently the bane of my existence
#theyre all dumb zelda / zelink things but i love the songs and im so !!!!#but i dont know how to Capture That without it being an ordeal or hating it or it being kibd of bad lol#specifically rn ive got Wild Eyed (London Grammar) and SALT (Sarah Belkner) in mind#but also like ... a HUGE chunk of f+tm discograpy and more LG and and yeah :(#idk im ... bad at it i always have been lol#rory's ramblings
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been having marco li wilson thoughts lately...just sooooooooo many marco li wilson thoughts
#idk it just came to me suddenly about how much i love him???#idk its so out of nowhere#but he's cool#i got my own lil hcs abt him which i think are really cool#him and grant only having 26 fics on ao3???#TWENTY SIX???#imma need yall to WAKE IT THE FUCK UP!!!#or ill have to step in....#london speaks#marco li wilson
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I’m absolutely not a proponent whatsoever of the take that a certain someone kept Taylor locked away for years in London, but I do have to think that one of the added bonuses of her now being back to being based full-time in the US is that she gets to see her extended family more often, especially when she now spends most weekends in the Midwest near them (loooool thanks killatrav)
#this post brought to you by my family dinner tonight for Christmas#and catching up on my dash and seeing Taylor with her cousins at the game tonight#I don’t know how often she got to see them all when she lived in London#(I mean I know she has her own plane she could fly back whenever)#but it’s really sweet that her aunt and cousins have shown up to a couple of kc games already this year#I’m guessing it must be fun to do this on the regular and not just at like major holidays or weddings/funerals#idk it’s the holidays I’m sentimental
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it's v funny to me that roger has been in london long enough that his sister died and came back to life again and he still has no idea.
#ds liveblogging.#MAN HAS MISSED SO MUCH ?#his governess got yeeted back into time. and then died. and then got saved. and then new governess.#son is possessed (by something other than autism)#werewolf on the property. roger neither knows nor cares.#tbh that's me when i was in london. do NOT bother me i'm going to the v&a.#idk how much time is really supposed to be passing i think last time they said it'd been a couple months but a few eps ago they said#itd been three weeks since liz's fake death. so idk. vibes only
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Just saw Six the musical in Boston and WOW. I love the album but it’s so much better live?? Usually I enjoy it live but overall prefer the album,, not here.
Energy was impeccable. I don’t know how the hell they have that much In the first place! Such high energy performances are so difficult to do repeatedly. But they nailed it. I really wish I could have the performance of “all you wanna do” recorded because UGHHH it was incredible
#six the musical#the person I saw it with has seen it 4 times total now (h ow) and told me it was the best performance they'd seen of it yet#so maybe I just got lucky with the actors#but Six just shot up to 'one of if not the best performances I've ever seen'#even the audio wasn't overbearingly loud and impossible to hear because of it#idk what broadway is on even my mother with hearing loss can't hear shit bc of how loud it gets#Maybe it's better in London#fuck if I know#all I know is whoever decided on the mic volume this show is based and deserves a raise
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if I have been a little quiet this past week that is bc life is swinging a giant cartoon mallet at my head and cackling like the joker experiencing the adrenaline rush of batman driving the batmobile towards him at 120mph. thank you
#my parents went away on holiday and left me in charge of my siblings and the house#which is fine and has happened before and my siblings are basically adults anyway#but my cat got sick again and had to go to the vet to the tune of hundreds of £#turns out he has a skin condition caused by flea bites which idk how he keeps getting them he is an INDOOR cat#the amount of flea pills i have given him in the past 6 months cannot be good for his health#so ive been spraying the whole house down with flea killer and washing all the bedsheets and laundry on the hottest settings#and then this evening he trotted downstairs with two bald paws where he has LICKED THE FUR OFF and it is raw and bleeding in spots#idk wtf to do at this point#he had another seizure too so his meds need adjusting again#so im going to spend more £££ at the vet#to top it all off i have non refundable coach tickets to visit my dad tomorrow so i kind of have to go#fucking. 8 hour journey. kill me#so my sister is going to have to take my boy to the vet instead and im anxious abt that#my special little boy shouldnt have to go to the scary place without me :(#but anyway losing my mind at the emd of my tether have barely picked up my phone the past few days#like what am i doing wrong does my cat just want to die or does he hate me#one thing after a fucking nother#and i have to go into fucking CENTRAL london tomorrow id rather eat fibreglass insulation xx#at least i get to read while im on the district line my beloved <3#dogbunni diary log
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simultaneously like having a Danny!Q daydream verse and knowing the logistics would trip me up if I tried to put it to paper
#also it would get awkward because I’m not sure I could rewatch London spy#super enjoyed it but like. too sad to put myself through it when I know what’s coming?#also q and Danny having wildly different skill sets#altho conceivably Danny could acquire the skills in Alex’s honor#anyway in my daydream M hired him as a sort of ‘Jesus Christ will you stop getting up in our business’ ploy#probably with an ultimatum that it’s that or Disappear#and he goes fuck it and takes the job#my brain has him rooming with Francis as a mutual protection thing so he is EXTREMELY cagey about his job#however he buries all his records and deletes any files he can get away with relating to himself and Alex#he’s sure M’s got back-ups but it makes him feel better#then skyfall and he’s promoted and Mallory takes over and he’s so sure he’s about to get burned#surprise m did not keep back-ups partially for exactly this reason#eventually Mallory gets curious about the dead ends in the Danny-Alex files and sends a bored Bond out to track down current statuses#this is how bond finds out q’s been sleeping on his sofa with a gun since his promotion#q’s not immediately suspicious tho since he knows bond does this to other ppl too#and bond is wise enough/isn’t sure he has the right conclusion so he doesn’t tell q or Mallory he’s figured it out#idk where it goes from there really but yeah
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scream cry throw up
#GOING LONDON TMRWWWW#AND I GOT A RLLY NICE JUMPER ITS PINK AMD FLUFFY WITH STARS AND NEW EYESHADOW ITS PIBK TOOOOO#SCREAMMMM#me and my friend did the blind and mute cake challenge today it was rlly fun#ofc i was blindfolded bc not being able to talk#would be jarrin#although i did purposefully not talk at all to anyone when i was 3-5#and again when i was 11 for abt six months soooo idk#BUT that shows how much i’ve changed since if#ig#personal
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how come werewolves of london is on every halloween playlist ever when roland the headless thompson gunner is RIGHT THERE
#they’re playing Halloween Music on the radio rn lol and I am once again asking for roland to be included#werewolves of london is. fine idk. I have no opinion about it.#but fuck me up with the ghost ballad lmao I love that shit#I need more ghost ballads hmmmm#in my heart I am tempted to call in and request it but I am far too anxious so I will just listen on my own later lol#also it is fun to noodle around with on the piano but I am at home rn#my beautiful clavinova come back to meeeee#thinking about my dad being like ‘it’s mine because I paid for it’ like you don’t even know how to play my guy fuck off#also it’s at my house lmao#I still have to get it fixed blehhh. two keys got damaged somehow when we were moving and I’ve just been pretending not to notice#the high c doesn’t matter but the d is super annoying. can’t even play czerny. or scales lmao#I should stay playing again. I miss when it was fun to play#most of the time it kind of sucked to play but idk. I miss the times it was fun
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